36 Questions to Fall in Love: How to Get Closer Faster
Are you looking for a way to get closer to someone you like? Do you want to build a stronger connection and fall in love faster? Then you should try out the 36 questions to fall in love.
These questions are designed to help you get to know someone better and build a deeper connection. They are based on the study done by psychologist Arthur Aron in 1997, which found that people who answered these questions together felt significantly closer to each other.
What Are the 36 Questions to Fall in Love?
The 36 questions to fall in love are divided into three sets of 12. Each set of questions gets progressively deeper, so it's best to start with the first set and work your way up. The questions are as follows:
Set One Questions
- Given the choice of anyone in the world, whom would you want as a dinner guest?
- Would you like to be famous? In what way?
- Before making a telephone call, do you ever rehearse what you are going to say? Why?
- What would constitute a “perfect” day for you?
- When did you last sing to yourself? To someone else?
- If you were able to live to the age of 90 and retain either the mind or body of a 30-year-old for the last 60 years of your life, which would you want?
- Do you have a secret hunch about how you will die?
- Name three things you and your partner appear to have in common.
- For what in your life do you feel most grateful?
- If you could change anything about the way you were raised, what would it be?
- Take four minutes and tell your partner your life story in as much detail as possible.
- If you could wake up tomorrow having gained any one quality or ability, what would it be?
Set Two Questions
- If a crystal ball could tell you the truth about yourself, your life, the future or anything else, what would you want to know?
- Is there something that you’ve dreamt of doing for a long time? Why haven’t you done it?
- What is the greatest accomplishment of your life?
- What do you value most in a friendship?
- What is your most treasured memory?
- What is your most terrible memory?
- If you knew that in one year you would die suddenly, would you change anything about the way you are now living? Why?
- What does friendship mean to you?
- What roles do love and affection play in your life?
- Alternate sharing something you consider a positive characteristic of your partner. Share a total of five items.
- How close and warm is your family? Do you feel your childhood was happier than most other people’s?
- How do you feel about your relationship with your mother?
Set Three Questions
- Make three true “we” statements each. For instance, “We are both in this room feeling … ”
- Complete this sentence: “I wish I had someone with whom I could share … ”
- If you were going to become a close friend with your partner, please share what would be important for him or her to know.
- Tell your partner what you like about them; be very honest this time, saying things that you might not say to someone you’ve just met.
- Share with your partner an embarrassing moment in your life.
- When did you last cry in front of another person? By yourself?
- Tell your partner something that you like about them already.
- What, if anything, is too serious to be joked about?
- If you were to die this evening with no opportunity to communicate with anyone, what would you most regret not having told someone? Why haven’t you told them yet?
- Your house, containing everything you own, catches fire. After saving your loved ones and pets, you have time to safely make a final dash to save any one item. What would it be? Why?
- Of all the people in your family, whose death would you find most disturbing? Why?
- Share a personal problem and ask your partner’s advice on how he or she might handle it. Also, ask your partner to reflect back to you how you seem to be feeling about the problem you have chosen.
How to Use the 36 Questions to Fall in Love
The best way to use the 36 questions to fall in love is to set aside enough time for the conversation. Make sure you have at least an hour when you won't be interrupted, and make sure you both feel relaxed and comfortable. Taking turns, ask each other the questions from the list and really listen to the answers. Be honest and open to your partner and be willing to answer any questions he or she may have for you.
It can be helpful to record your conversations, as it can be easy to forget some of the questions and answers. After completing the 36 questions, take a few moments to reflect on the conversation. If it feels natural, you can keep the conversation going and talk about other topics.
Conclusion
The 36 questions to fall in love are a great way to build a deeper connection between two people. If you are looking to get closer to someone, try out this list of questions and see how it affects your relationship. You might be surprised by how much you learn about each other and how quickly you can fall in love.